Is Unforgiveness A Deal Breaker For God?

Matthew 6:14 ESV

14 For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, 15 but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.

I recently had an encounter in a group related to the topic of unforgiveness, and how it is a deal breaker with God. The person who posted the message said unforgiveness blocks your relationship with God and puts you at risk for not being rapture ready and possibly not being saved.

There was a person I got into a conversation with who said this is unbiblical and scolded the people who gave comments agreeing to the message of the post; she ripped me apart. I was told I was basing my salvation on works, that when Jesus was talking about forgiveness he was talking to the Jews, and that I should only be using dispensationalism and following the writings of Paul in Romans through Philemon.

I was also told that we are saved by grace (and I agree) solely in our belief in that Jesus is the Son of God who died on the cross for us so that our sins may be forgiven, and that He died and was resurrected on the third day. I completely agree with this. It is the foundation for everything. I was told that the moment we believe this we receive the baptism of the Holy Spirt.

But here's the thing: my testimony in how I truly came to Christ is centered, based, and founded on the words of Jesus regarding forgiveness in the passage above. And I had alraedy believed the Gospel given in 1 Corinthians 15:1-4 which I post almost every day. Yet, I did not receive the baptism of the Holy Spirit until I began to obey what Jesus said about forgiveness. It was when I was really trying to forgive those who have hurt me in my life and really desired to let go of it that I was forever changed. Jesus reached into my heart and took out for me the last bits of unforgiveness I had in my heart that I was having trouble releasing on my own, and it was in that exact moment that I was given the Holy Spirit. I think in that moment I had reached the true state of repentance that Jesus was seeking of me. In truly desiring to forgive, I had finally truly let go of my pride. That is my theory, guess, and gut feeling.

How can I deny such an experience? I can't; I would be lying and denying God's power at the same time.

Here is an additional bit of insight the Holy Spirit has given me this last week: God is a jealous God, and He wants us to put Him first in our hearts, before the things of this world. He wants us to be merciful, because He is merciful. If we are holding on to unforgiveness in our hearts then we are holding onto things of this world, and we are also preventing ourselves from receiving the peace that defies all understanding that comes from God.

So I'm left with this: I do believe there is some merit to dispensationalism, however I cannot agree with ignoring Matthew, Mark, Luke and John simply because Jesus was speaking to the Jews. Jesus is God, and I personally think we do ourselves a huge disservice and dishonor Him by not heeding what He said. And Jesus stressed the message of forgiveness multiple times. Based on the emphasis Jesus gave to the message of forgiveness, and my own personal experience given in my testimony, I think that there is merit to the idea that unforgiveness is a deal breaker to God.